Nerd, metal head, smart ass, poop joke connoisseur, pervert. All of the things you wish you could be.

• Age: 30
• Gender: Female
• Industry: Metal
• Occupation: Professional Eavesdropper
• Location: St. Paul

I have been pseudo-blogging for over a decade, beginning with really awesome geocities websites loaded with tons of animated .gifs and other content that provoked subconjunctival hemorrhages.

No, you’re not confused. I’ve been doing it a long time and I haven’t gotten any good at it.